Thursday, January 17, 2008

Content creation in the service of LOVE - Eshi Otawara's Taj Mahal

With Valentine's Day fast approaching, I created a new group in Flickr called NPIRL <3 - Content creation in the service of LOVE, and invited Flickrites to share their photographs and stories about their own personal experiences. Here is one of the first entries and I think you'll agree it, it's smashing.

by Eshi Otawara

I was about 4 months old and still seeking self - sort to speak. At that point, most of my 'SLife' was socializing and hopping from place to place trying desperately to distract myself from grieving the passing of my (RL) husband. One day, at a club I used to frequent, there stood a man with long hair and purple sparkling eyes. I thought he had a rather funny mustache which turned out to be an excellent conversation starter.

As if we have known each other for years prior, we stayed there and talked, laughed, cried, and before we knew it some 8 hours have gone by. For the next couple of months we spent many more hours learning from each other about each other in a beautiful platonic relationship. I don't think I ever felt so deeply understood and connected to a human being and even though we were cultures and miles apart (I am Croatian living in USA, he is Hindu living in Australia) and our bond was strong. His wisdom was rare, his kindness to me was disarming and his way of showing me he cared for me was indeed the thing that prompted the first steps out of the most sickening depression I ever experienced.

One day we were both obviously very tired and we got into an argument. I hurt his feeling so deeply that he left saying he'd never speak to me again. I was shattered after I realized what I've done and It haunted me so badly that the only thing I could feel and think of was the desire to make him happy again.

I went to a sandbox to try to distract myself by taking a shot at building a 'house'. I threw out a prim and remembered one of our first conversations when he said only true Love can give life to most beautiful and miraculous things... like the Taj Mahal, the world's most beautiful monument to Love...adding he always wanted to see that building in Second Life.

At that point, I was not a builder - all I have ever built was an over sized ice cream cone and my building skills were truly nowhere near good enough to undertake something like the Taj Mahal, but I wasn't focusing on my insecurity of being judged for a bad build. I focused on his words about Love and great things, and thought about his happiness...

The prims kept flowing for hours... building on as I duplicated, shaped, rotated and textured them in white marble. One minaret was done, then another... and another... The sensation of gratitude for his presence in my life regardless of the outcome, the desire to fulfill his wish which was not his expectation of me by any means, all of that kept me going for 3 days. And after 3 days- there it was. I stared at the Taj not believing how it got built. I have secretly dreamed of being a builder since I got to Second Life, but before this I never had the courage... In all actuality, I am still not comfortable taking the credit for this build. Vajra's Taj was built by pure Love which only used me as a vessel.

I took a snapshot of it and sent it to him without saying anything else but - "Thank You." And I am still thankful, and always will be thankful.

Without this man's love, I would never have gotten the courage to create in Second Life.


Lauren said...

Eshi, you have a wonderful heart sharing this story with us. You also are a great builder, artist and friend

Eshi Otawara said...

Aw thanks Lauren. :) <3 u 2.

moon said...

I loved reading this story, very touching. Thanks for sharing.

sungoddess said...

Eshi... someone bought me one of your dresses for my rezz day on December 4... I fell madly inlove with this dress, and since then, I've been looking at your other clothes, and reading your blogs, and what other people have written about you... while I do not know you and had no intention of specifically writing or commenting on your blogs etc... this post... this post resonated with me in ways I cannot begin to describe... hence, I am typing here hoping to reach out and let you know, your talent is amazing, and I'm glad a gift from two friends I love dearly, has led me to an artist I now admire greatly. Be blessed! Blessings and Good Things, Osuntomi Melendez <-- inworld